Who did Billy Mays play for?
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Randomize
