this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
Randomize
