I am a bulletproof tiger!
Haha. Nice, be careful tonight.
I'm gonna have to get my windshield replaced. Is the keg beat?
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Randomize
