so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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