Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
