Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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