Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
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