is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
cat food counts as protein by the way
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize
