Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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