Whoa Z and x make the same sound
You smell like stripper and shame
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
