I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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