go do what you do best...puke behind churches
mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
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