Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I think weed is turning my hair brown
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
