that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Randomize
