How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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