oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
