oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Randomize
