The verizon commercial has a magical pinata. Candy just keeps coming out. It must be a portal to a candy universe.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
