I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
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