But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
