I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
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