You're my little dorito
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
Randomize
