dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Randomize
