How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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