Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Why is there bacon in the couch?
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
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