My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
i texted "amiibo vore" to my insurance agent instead of someone else. do you think they'll raise my rates out of disgust?
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
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