well most of my day revolves around power hour
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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