I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
TAing a class of 300 froshies and being so hungover I forgot a bra is my way of making dreams come true.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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