you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
