escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
