Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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