How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
I want to be your penis for a week.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
