Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
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