Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
she looked like the before picture.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
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