i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
