Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
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