so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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