Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
Randomize
