It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Randomize
