but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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