its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Randomize
