And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Randomize
