They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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