i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
