Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
OH MY GOD I AM DYING. AS I WAS TEXTING I JUST BUMPED INTO A MOTHER FUCKING DEER. I AM SHAKING
Wait...Literally? You hit a deer...with your body?!
I PHYSICALLY RAN INTO IT. I FELT ITS WEIRD HAIR AND I EVEN APOLOGIZED CAUSE IT DINDT REGISTER THAT IT WASNT A PERSON. MORTIFIED.
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