my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
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