even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Randomize
