No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
