im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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