Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
