Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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